Our Families Say 8

A thought came to me the other day about the importance of asking the right question when I’m faced with a situation with my child: I wish that I always knew the right question to ask and how to phrase it, so my child would be able to give me the details that would help me support and understand him.

The best days have been when I have found that right question. Then I can understand and support the needs of my child. I feel powerful as a parent, on-track and on-focus.

The worst days are when an event has already happened. It’s only then I have sudden clarity about what question I should have asked at the onset. I begin to second-guess myself and am overly critical about what I should have done.

The reality is, as a parent, I need to do my best each day. Some days everything will line up and tough situations will work out smoothly. Other days, nothing will line up. Situations will blow up like a hurricane with gale force winds.

The piece that I need to focus on during each rough day is finding the positive and doing my best. I must look at the areas where I can improve in a positive light, and work on developing skills to help me get through.

The piece that I need to focus on during a good day is asking: Why did that day go so well? What made it different? And, if I cannot figure it out, I just need to celebrate that it was a smooth day!

—Anonymous parent