Don’t let it consume you

file0002108422738When I was in the hospital I felt very alone, in need of comfort. I had asked myself many questions and I wondered if God was forgiving or if I was going to hell. I was in a lot of pain, physically and emotionally.

The staff didn’t understand my mental illness.  I think it was either because they didn’t try or (this is what I believe) they didn’t know how it felt. The staff was pretty ignorant and mostly, thought about their paychecks, as they informed me. I do realize now how hard it is to understand someone else, but it felt so self centered.

My peers and friends made me feel better because they would be there for me. They understood me and my illness. They were like me, in a way and that really helped.

I got most of my support from my peers and friends because we were all in the same boat: we all had a lot of the same problems and experiences. The only real help I got was from them. They were the ones who got me through.

My friends understood me because we had a lot in common with one another and we could talk to each other like trustworthy friends do. We all needed each other in this scary foreign place.

What I learned in the hospital was that life had meaning. God was with me and would guide me through. You can find friends where you don’t expect to. Life has twists and turns but that is what gives it purpose. Life is worth living, it is a gift and you can choose how you use it. When people say mean things to you, it doesn’t really matter. All that matters is what you think of healing yourself — just ignore them.  And don’t let it consume you.

I learned an important lesson about people who have mental illnesses, people like me or the people I met in the hospital. We are just like everyone else and can be the best friends you’ll ever find. We don’t deserve abuse or neglect. We deserve love and understanding. We have needs and they are SPECIAL needs.

Our guest blogger, JesseRou,  is a high school student who loves sports and wants to work with animals.  She feels close to her family and connected to her religion.  She writes about her anxiety and her experiences with the hope it will help other youth.

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10 thoughts on “Don’t let it consume you

  1. JesseRou- Great Blog!! An important message to many that have been in your shoes. Thank you for sharing your wisdom, experience and HOPE . Especially HOPE!!!

  2. JesseRou- Amen. What a beautifully written and poignant piece! Keep up the good work, you are a treasure and don’t ever let anyone make you think otherwise!

  3. It’s great that you have found friends that can relate but especially help. Such wonderful insight for those of us who aren’t facing the issues you are facing and you are right, unless we walk in your shoes we don’t know. I can relate to the value of friendship and God’s help in getting through those tough times. Not my words, but very meaningful: You are a special person, with unique God given talents and abilities. Only you can fulfill the purpose which you were born to accomplish. Never allow yourself to get discouraged and think that your life is insignificant and cannot be changed and always remember that the most important part of who you are is what’s inside of you.

  4. Thanks, JesseRou. You words show how special you are. Everyone needs to be loved and to love. I guess that means we’re all in the same boat. Your friends understand you, that’s why they are there for you. Others will find you, people you have not yet met. Give them a chance and share your message with everyone who will listen.

  5. Jesse, Thank you so much for sharing this part of your journey. I agree with you when you said, “life is worth living, it is a gift and you can choose how you use it.” Your resilience is inspiring.

  6. Your essay is very moving and I admire your insight and how well you express yourself. Your parents must be very proud of you. Keep up the good work!

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